hephaestus

Moving on never felt this good!  Finally I can pack my bags without any form of hesitation, zip it tight and head straight out the door.  My mind is clearer and I am ready to take on another journey that life has to offer.  I will be carrying with me the lessons I learned from my past and all the happy memories that I once experienced.  I don't know what lies ahead waiting for me around the sharp corners but it really doesn't matter right now.  All I know is I am fine, feeling better and excited.

It all started with simple phone calls, the usual 'Hi' and 'Hello' and some 'How are you these past few days?'.  My first reactions were 'I am fine now' and 'What else would you like to know?'.  I am not good with handling heartaches and break-ups.  Until finally I realized I am so tired pretending to be angry when all this time all I wanted were answers.  And today I had the chance to ask my questions and found the real answers.  I have never felt so relieved in my entire life!  It's like untangling a pile of threads and spool them one by one.

It's just unfortunate that from the time that we asked for our freedom up to this day I learned to let go of my emotions, not because I want to but because I have to.  So when asked if the past is really part of the past, I paused for a moment and quietly replied, "Yes, because it would be unfair if I would accept those who wanted me back knowing that I don't have anything left to give them."  There was silence, a long eerie silence before "I understand".  Then another pause, "Am I free to love anyone I choose now?" to which I replied, "We already had that freedom the day we walked away from each other".

Before hanging up I expressed my thanks for the relationship and love that we once shared together and now we shall begin our journey as friends.  Who said lovers can't return to being friends?  And what is so bittersweet about everything is the message I received after the phone call, "I still love you."  I would like to reply, "I still do, too" but decided not to for one should not try to return to whence they came because they will never get to their destination if they do.